Story Sensei

Congratulations! You’ve decided to take that wonderful, scary step and write that novel burning inside you. Writing is an art, just like music. A musician wouldn’t expect to sit down at a piano or take up a violin and immediately crank out a perfect rendition of Mozart. Good music requires learning and practice. Good writing is the same way, requiring learning and practice. Thanks to the internet, free and inexpensive resources are readily available to anyone who wants to write their first novel. This article lists some tips, books, articles, and websites that I found most useful when I started writing. Join a writing community. The best money I spent was in joining an online writing organization. Writing groups have informative discussion loops, workshop archives, and sometimes critique groups. Often, published authors are on the email loop to give advice that you can’t read in a book. I joined American Christian Fiction Writers , which is a large organization that has a liv

My previous article on pitching to editors and agents was in informal settings. This is more targeted information about when you have an appointment to speak to an agent or editor. Because you have several minutes, the purpose of an agent/editor appointment at a conference is more than just pitching. It’s a chance for you to learn about the agent/editor’s personality, and if they’re someone you want to work with. This is very important. A business relationship is more than just professionalism—it’s how personalities work with each other, kind of like a marriage. Therefore, use your time wisely. I’m going to break this down into writer experience level, because I agree with Randy Ingermanson when he talks about Freshman, Sophomore, Junior, and Senior level writers . (If you haven’t read his article yet, please do so before continuing with this one, since I’ll be referring to it.) For Freshmen, Sophomores, early Juniors: My suggestion is not to officially pitch your story at all. I’ve h

(reprinted from Camy's Loft blog) The ACFW Conference is only a couple months away! I’m totally excited about the awards ceremony. Besides the Genesis contest winners, ACFW will also announce the Book of the Year winners, the Mentor of the Year, the Editor of the Year, and the Agent of the Year! Today I’m very happy to have my agent Wendy Lawton with me. Wendy is one of the nominees for Agent of the Year, and I heartily hope she wins it! Wendy Lawton, me, and Debbie Macomber You've attended various conferences over the years. In your opinion, what makes ACFW's conference stand out from the others? The content is focused entirely on fiction, the presenters are knowledgeable and approachable, the atmosphere is fun and friendly and the attendees are among the best prepared anywhere. Any advice you'd like to offer to a 1st time conference attendee? I'd love for attendees to remember that building a writing career is usually a slow process. It takes a number of meetings,

I got this tip on backstory from Brandilyn Collins: Any knowledge you give to the reader has to cause the reader to ask more questions. Let me repeat that: Any knowledge you give to the reader has to cause the reader to ask more questions. What that means for you as the writer is that any narrative or backstory has to be very carefully chosen and given. Any narrative or backstory has to have a very specific purpose for the story, and that narrative or backstory should work to make the reader ask more questions about the character or storyline. You want to foster that sense of “What’s going on?” for the reader that will make the reader keep reading in order to find out. For example: He sidled up to Anna, two hundred pounds of male testosterone, smelling faintly of tobacco and whiskey. “Hey, good lookin’, want some company?” She saw through his rough-and-ready façade. He worked for the Evil Triumvirate. She had crossed three state lines to try to escape them, but they’d found her at la

Flashbacks can be great things because they show backstory in real time, versus just narrative (which is “telling” rather than “showing”). However, they tend to slow the reading flow—either with the content of the flashback or the initial transition into the flashback. So you have to place and use flashbacks very judiciously. 1—Be careful about WHEN you go into flashback. Since the transition will slow the reading flow, specifically time your flashback for when you want to create a lull in the reading pace, maybe after a tense or conflicted scene. 2—Be careful about HOW you go into flashback. The best thing is to have the flashback triggered by a very significant event in the story. Don’t just morph into a flashback from a scene that’s already meandering, or else you could lose reader interest. 3—Make the flashback as CONFLICTED and TENSE as you can. The transition is already going to slow the reading pace, so make the flashback powerful and vivid to keep the reading flow going smoothl

One great way to show emotion is with contrast. You can contrast the character’s emotions to another character, or maybe the surroundings. The man’s gaze didn’t waver, and she shivered in the hot noon sunlight. She turned away from the child’s sunshine smile, sodden and shivering from the thunderstorm in her heart. Contrast can both intensify the emotion and enable ways for you to be creative in your emotional writing. Don’t fall back on clichés (like I did in the first example above, although the second example isn’t too bad). Be original and richly emotional at the same time.

(Part One is here .) When I first started going to conferences, I had the Hello down pat, but couldn’t think of what to say after that. I had to learn the art of conversation, but I discovered it’s actually not that hard. More than a list of questions to remember—which you won’t remember when you’re nervous and meeting people—here are a few tips on how to keep the conversation going. Keep up with publishing news. This is useful for conversation with editors, agents, and even writers. You can ask editors questions about their publishing house based on information you might have read, or you can ask the agent questions about a certain genre market. For example, there were several personnel changes in a specific publishing house in a short period of time, and I had read about it. I chatted with an employee for that publishing house at a conference and asked her how things were going, if things had settled into a routine, if the personnel was replaced yet, etc. Keep yourself well informe

I am not a natural extrovert, but I exert myself when I’m at a conference because I want to meet people. However, since I’m not naturally an extrovert, I had to teach myself how to meet people at a booksigning, or while walking the floor of ICRS, or when mingling with writers at a conference. These are a few tips for writers who are introverts like myself. Much of it is simply common sense or common politeness, but it’s good to reiterate here so you are aware of specific things to avoid doing, and specific things to exert yourself to do. DON’T go up to chat with someone you know if they’re talking with someone else. Be sensitive. They might be in an important conversation with their agent/editor/publicist/marketing director. If they wave hi to you but go on talking to the other person, definitely don’t crash their conversation—just keep walking past. However, if they pause the conversation to give you a hug or say a few words, then it’s fine for you to approach them. DON’T gush

I'm at ICRS until late next week. Also, any particular writing craft or business topics you want me to cover on this Story Sensei blog? Camy

Sometimes a scene will seem flat. It might be because you need to add more emotion to the scene. The richness of physical description, character actions, dialogue, thoughts. In his book, Techniques of the Selling Writer , the very first thing Dwight Swain talks about is emotion , because it’s one of the important aspects of fiction writing. No matter if you write action, women’s fiction, suspense, or chick lit, emotion is the key factor in any scene. Whether it’s your hero’s dogged determination and rush of adrenaline as he runs from an exploding oil refinery, or it’s your heroine’s angst and frustration at her matchmaking, meddling mother. Emotion is what drives the character, and rivets the reader to the action or drama on the page. When you read your scene, what emotions do you feel? What emotions do you want to feel? Focus on the emotion and write it—write what matters to you, what you want the reader to care about. Ramp up the emotion in your scene to give it depth and vitality.

First person internal thoughts also tend to be a lot of backstory, which slows down the reading flow. It might be fun and quirky narrative, but it’s still a backstory dump however you look at it. Mom ran off years ago with the family lawyer, and while I can’t say Dad was all that great, the lawyer was worse. She finally clued in when she found him groping his admin in his office one day. Mom, being Mom, told him, “I have decided to seek new legal representation.” And then she walked out. Anyway, the entire incident has made her gunshy about hiring any lawyers, which is why she now bothers me to bother my boyfriend, who will give her free legal counsel without the inconvenience of actually paying for it. Gasp! The cure for this is the same as in third person POV: a) Give only snippets of backstory, not a whole bunch at once. b) Mention backstory only when it’s absolutely vital to the current action. c) Make a character absolutely need to know—that way your reader will also absolutely ne

In first person POV, especially, writers have a great deal of narrative and internal thoughts. While that narrative tends to have some conflict in it, too much narrative means less movement in the scene. And you can’t really substitute true conflict (action and dialogue) with the conflict in a long paragraph of internal thought—the scene drags and meanders. I look at the call waiting. It’s my mother. Mom has this annoying habit of calling right when I’m about to watch CSI . Even though I’ve told her again and again that she can’t call on this particular night at this particular time, she blithely ignores me. I might as well be talking to the cat. And at least the cat answers with a polite meow. Mother barely acknowledges I’ve spoken, much less what I’ve said. All this narrative is more “telling” than “showing.” Instead of all this internal thought, why not show the information in action and dialogue? I look at the call waiting. It’s my mother. I stab the TALK button. “Mom, it’s CSI ni

In a lot of the chick lit entries I judge in contests, first person POV is not done very well. Since the reader is reading first person, the reader should actually be in the character’s skin and experiencing the scene through them. People like writing first person POV because it’s easy—but it’s actually rather difficult to write with power and vibrancy. While each writer has different strengths and weakness, in general, the entries I judge lack enough conflict and action. Not much happens, and there isn’t a lot of tension. In first person POV, this is a common problem because it’s so easy to fall into internal thoughts and narrative instead. “Do you want a cookie?” I hand the plate to Amelia. She’s a size two. I wish I was a size two. I eye a couple of the chocolate-laden golden-brown goodies. Just one won’t hurt me. Amelia glances at the plate, then goes back to sorting through her charm collection. “No, thanks. I’m not hungry.” Her charms fascinate me. She’s had some for generations

Randy Ingermanson interviewed me for his Advanced Fiction Writing blog. Randy has done a wonderful service to all writers with his blog. His Advanced Fiction Writing ezine was already a terrific resource, but his blog is even better because he welcomes and answers questions from writers. He is a true writing mentor, in every sense of the word. His questions had mostly to do with branding, so if you’re a writer wondering about branding yourself, check it out!

Clichés are not just in phrases (“he ran his fingers through is hair,” “her heart pounded”). Clichés can be larger scale—your characters, your setting, your plot premise. The problem is that often, these larger scale clichés are not so easily realized. For example, there are a LOT of pastor heroes in Inspirational romance. Editors were commenting that they’d like to see less stories with pastor heroes. However, as a writer, unless you heard the editor say this at a conference, you wouldn’t know. So how can you find these things out? You should be reading extensively in the genre in which you’re writing. Why? So you can discover what’s already been done in your genre, so you don’t repeat it. If you haven’t read many Inspirational romances, but you’re targeting Steeple Hill, you wouldn’t know that there have been a lot of pastor heroes in the past few years. However, if you’ve been reading Steeple Hill novels, you would know that. You don’t have to read every single title that comes out,

Does your hero run his fingers through his hair? Does your heroine bite her bottom lip? Or maybe your hero squeezes his eyes shut and pinches the bridge of his nose when he’s frustrated. Maybe your heroine’s gut clenches or she swallows hard when hearing bad news. Perhaps your hero clenches his jaw, or sees red. Perhaps your heroine feels ice water in her veins when she’s shocked, or a fluttering in her chest when she’s excited. Cliches—DON’T. Don’t use the same gestures or descriptions for your characters that you’ve read in dozens of other novels. BE ORIGINAL. The heroine’s heart doesn’t pound—it does a combination triple-axel double-lutz worthy of Michelle Kwan. The hero doesn’t feel his stomach drop—he’s a hanging victim with the clunk of the trapdoor ringing in his ears, waiting for his feet to register that he’s dangling in mid-air. A great resource for original descriptions is literary fiction (if you can read it). But don’t copy them—use it as a jumping off point for your own u

One of the best things I got out of the seminar taught by New York agent Donald Maass is to add tension to absolutely every single sentence in your manuscript. I can see some of you gaping. Close your mouth. It’s true. He had us pick a random page in our manuscripts and then pick a random paragraph. We had to add some sort of tension to every sentence in the paragraph—whether internal or external. It changed the energy of the writing immediately. I could see that just from that one paragraph. I changed the tension in every sentence on the page, and the difference astounded me. The scene was so much more charged, crackling with energy and vitality. Basically, it increases the level of conflict in the scene, and conflict is what keeps a reader reading. Conflict keeps a reader’s interest. While we like to avoid conflict in real life, in fiction, it’s gold. You don’t have to remember to add tension to every sentence in your rough draft—just lay the words down. Don’t think too much or analy

Your plot should have a definite inciting incident that signals when the story begins. In Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen, the inciting incident is when Mr. Bingley moves into the neighborhood. In Violet Dawn by Brandilyn Collins , the inciting incident is when the heroine discovers a dead body in her outdoor hot tub. In The Restorer by Sharon Hinck , the inciting incident is when the heroine is suddenly transported into an alternate fantasy world. In Over Her Head by Shelley Bates , the inciting incident is when the heroine discovers the body of a drowned young girl the same age as her own daughter. In Split Ends by Kristin Billerbeck , the inciting incident is when the heroine moves to Los Angeles to become a successful hairdresser. In The Reliance by M.L. Tyndall , the inciting incident is when the church is blown up and the hero believes his wife was killed, when in reality she’s been kidnapped by pirates. In each of the above examples, something has happened to change the

Some synopses I read have a lot of conflict against the character, but not necessarily many obstacles against the character’s external goal. There’s a significant difference. The primary conflict and tension in a story should be things that work directly against the heroine’s external goal. They shouldn’t be just annoyances here and there. The conflict should be focused against what the heroine wants to accomplish in the story. For example, Sarah is a pop music singer whose external goal is to get her picture on the cover of Rolling Stone. Her mother’s getting married for the fourth time, and Sarah really doesn’t want to be involved in all the planning for something that will probably only last a year or two. Their strained relationship erupts in arguments every few weeks. Sarah’s dog is sick, and she has to go to the vet all the time. The bills are adding up. This new guy in town is cute, but Sarah’s interested in her career and not a relationship. In the above conflicts, none of them

Even if you’re a seat of the pants writer, try doing a sketchy outline. Many of my friends sell books on proposal, which means they write three chapters and an outline of the book, not the entire manuscript. When their publisher okays the proposal, they write the book based on the outline. Sometimes the book changes from the outline, but just having the outline can help a writer focus their story better. A sketchy outline can be as simple as four sentences— One sentence for the character’s beginning world, and the inciting incident that starts them on their external goal. One sentence for the middle, and the kinds of things that will directly obstruct the character’s external goal. One sentence for the climax and the black moment. One sentence to explain how things wrap up at the end. See? Very sketchy, and very simple. Yet sometimes even a sketchy outline will help a writer in amazing ways as they write their book.

One of the key elements of a good climax is some sort of sacrifice. The main character sacrifices something precious for the greater good. Whether she sacrifices her external goal, or her life, or something equally important, the climax should see her giving up something that matters to herself. Sometimes it’s to do the right thing—she gives up her external goal or her life in order to do something infinitely more noble. Sometimes it’s because she has no choice—the villain is going to kill someone else or take away someone else’s livelihood if she doesn’t comply. Sometimes it’s more emotional—the hero faces a deep-set fear in order to do something for someone else. Or perhaps the hero takes a risk in order to accomplish something for someone else. Whatever you decide, your character should give up something extremely precious and important at that climax. Why is this important? Because in sacrificing something, the hero has reached the Black Moment, where All Hope Is Gone. And in sacri

Your hero or heroine’s external goal should NOT change during the course of the story. Say at the beginning of your story, Sally decides to unmask a smuggling ring. If she accomplishes it by chapter fifteen and then decides to discover who her real father is, that is a changed external goal. Your character’s external goal should remain the same for the entire story. If things suddenly change at a particular point and the character moves into a different direction for the rest of the book, maybe that particular point is where your story ought to start, and the events beforehand are just backstory. Also beware of more subtly changed external goals. Say Sally decides to unmask a drug smuggling ring. She finds out who’s behind it by chapter fifteen, and then starts investigating someone else who’s using drugs to capture children from the middle school as addicts and additional sellers. Her goal has subtly changed from investigating the ring to investigating drug use in the middle school.

By Camy Tang I am a lazy butt. I freely admit it. I hate going outside and I dislike sweating. (I also tend to sweat a lot, but that’s probably TMI.) Therefore, I’ve been trying to find ways to “sneak” exercise into my day so I’m not just sitting on fat lazy butt (mentioned above) all day. Not all these tips will work for you, but any change in your routine will help. Stand at your computer. I originally started doing this because I read about it in Levenger catalog. Levenger sells wonderfully cool (and kind of expensive) risers to elevate your computer and your workspace on your desk so that you can stand a little, then sit a little all day. Sit to Stand Desk Laptop Lifter They say that standing and sitting while working is very beneficial health-wise—it enables blood to circulate in your legs more than if you just sit all day. I’ve also read about people standing at their desks all the time. One person even had a slow moving treadmill especially built so he could walk slowly while wo

Thoughts can be a fabulous way to not only convey information, but to convey intense emotions. The key is to take advantage of point of view. Setup: Laura is in a new church, and she’d filled out a Visitor’s card when she first entered the doors. Now, at the end of the service, the worship leader has been given her card. “Laura Duke? Are you here? Please stand up so we can greet you!” He smiled as if conveying a Publisher’s Clearing House check to her. Oh, how embarrassing. Laura slowly rose with a small smile. The church members turned to look at her, then sat back in their seats. No warm smiles—okay, maybe one from that lady in the corner with the Coke-bottle lenses. Nothing more than a few disinterested glances. She sat down again as fast as possible. That was horrible. Instead of telling her emotion, you can show it with the nature of her thoughts—with her tone, with the language and words. “Laura Duke? Are you here? Please stand up so we can greet you!” He smiled as if conveying a

Captain’s Log, Supplemental Fiction Fundamentals Linda Fulkerson has launched this new blog/website with TONS of information for writers, and new stuff being posted every day. If you’re not sure where to start when it comes to learning more about writing, this is a good site. It gives lots of links and recommendations. Here’s what Linda says about it: The purpose is to help those who wish to learn more about the craft of fiction, especially newcomers. There are tons of links in a number of categories, plus three days a week (Mon-Wed-Fri), I post on the blog. There is also monthly "Leave-a-Link" contest, where everyone who leaves a new resource link during that month will be placed into a drawing for a book. I hope to develop it into a great resource for those who are learning fiction--kind of a one-stop learning location. On another note, during the month of June on my personal blog, http://linesfromlinda.com , (you may not have time/room to mention this), I've revived &

Touchstone Books and Media Predict have a contest for writers! Touchstone Books, an imprint of publishing company Simon & Schuster, Inc., is teaming up with Media Predict. Through our Project Publish contest, Touchstone Books will select a book proposal from our site for future publication. Via Project Publish, Touchstone Books will be the first major publisher to put our market-based method for evaluating media content to the test. In October, a team of editors, including Touchstone publisher Mark Gompertz, will evaluate the 50 top scoring book proposals on Media Predict. They’ll select five book proposals as Project Publish finalists, and eventually one grand prize winner. Visit their website at Project Publish .

One of the best way to reveal character emotions and personality is to have a character respond to the setting rather than simply describe it. Setup: The heroine is Betty, with an abusive past, visiting her parents' home for the first time in years. The crystal-paned bay windows followed her with a malevolent gaze as she approached the front double doors, as if to mock her for being forced to return after all these years. She imagined the white columns as teeth about the chew her up. Even the sunlight stung her skin. She forced her feet onward, step by step, keeping her eyes lowered to the blood-red flowers dripping down either side of the concrete walkway. The stiff wind from the bay slapped her cheeks and jerked her hair around her face. Why did she have to come back here? The reader gets a picture of the setting, but they also get the character’s emotional response to it. Suddenly it’s not just a setting, it’s an emotional experience for the reader. They feel the character’s rea

Writing emotions is very closely linked to other factors: --the words you use --character personality --point of view A writer can take advantage of point of view to show emotions in different characters. Emotions depend very strongly on the who point of view character is, and how they respond to the action. On Monday, John kissed Sally and I showed her confusion and denial. But what if John kissed Victoria instead? She thrust him away. She stared at him a long moment. Her heart still pounded, still feeling the pulse of his when he had pressed her against him. She didn’t understand. He had just walked into town last week, and today she melted in his arms like butter on her French crepe pan. Why did she respond to him so forcefully? Did she love him? Did he love her? Of course he didn’t love her. He was probably simply taking a little pleasure in his aimless wanderings. And she, like a wanton woman, had responded to his passion, his fire, his strength. All physical—nothing more. While h

Writing emotions is very closely linked to other factors: --the words you use --character personality --point of view Because emotions are meshed with these other aspects, often a writer will hear the infamous “show, don’t tell” and yet not understand what exactly it means. Setup: John has just kissed Sally. She thrust him away. She stared at him a long moment. First she felt confused. Why had he done that? Then, like a fingersnap, she was in denial. It probably meant nothing to him. Camy here: First, don’t use “she felt” or anything like that—she saw, she heard, etc.—because it distances the reader from the character. Second, try not to use the words of the emotions—confusion, denial. Instead of writing “she felt confused,” show the reader how confused she is. Instead of informing the reader she was in denial, show what she’s denying and why. She thrust him away. She stared at him a long moment. Why had he done that? Did he love her? He’d just met her—how could he love her? And she di

Brandilyn Collins talks about this in her excellent writing book, Getting Into Character . Obviously I’ve never been chased down an abandoned alley in the dead of night with a serial killer on my tail. However, I’ve been scared senseless before. I bring up that memory—painfully embarrassing though it might be, sigh —which is my jumping off point for writing the intensity of my heroine’s panic. I close my eyes and picture the scene. For me, it was a dark night and a strange shadow that crossed my window as I lay in bed. I can feel my terror, hear my wild thoughts, and even my body responds to the memory. I can smell the strangely smokey scent of the recent rain. (The shadow ended up being my neighbor sitting on the stone wall and smoking, but we won’t go into that.) I recreate my own terror with my heroine’s terror as she races down that lone alleyway. I copy my thoughts, the feelings in my body, the way fright tastes in my mouth. All those things go into my heroine’s point of view. (Ok

Your scene should climax both in terms of plot and emotion. It should start with a protagonist with a scene goal—what he wants to accomplish in that scene. His emotional starting point is determination, a plan of action. Next, you throw obstacles in the protagonist’s path so he can’t get his goal. This builds frustration, anxiety, sadness. Up your character’s emotional state. Build the obstacles to become more and more difficult. At the same time, build the character’s emotional intensity. Go from frustration to anger, or anxiety to panic, or sadness to depression. At last, deliver a final blow—a disaster at the end of the scene. This will also be the height of your character’s emotions. Ride it for all it’s worth. By building the character emotions, you also build your reader’s emotions for the character. Take your reader on an emotional ride, and they won’t be able to stop turning the pages.

Each character in your book will have a different way of describing things pertaining to themselves and the world around them. It’s no less for their emotions. Your manly ex-Navy SEAL isn’t going to describe his surprise as a gasp and a fluttering in his chest. He’s going to feel like a hollow-point copperhead has slugged him in the gut. Likewise, your small farming town preacher’s daughter isn’t going to describe the heated family argument as the headache-inducing staccato clamor of Chinese grandmothers at the San Francisco Chinatown fish market. She’ll describe the sounds as the fierce pelting of hailstones echoing in an empty barn, resonating in her skull as if they were falling on her head instead of the roof. When describing your character’s emotions, think about their gender, backgrounds, experiences. Make the emotions you describe specific and unique to that character’s personality and backstory.

Actions and body language are terrific tools for showing character emotion. When coupled with dialogue, physical reactions, and thoughts, the reader gets a complete picture of what the character is feeling, and better yet experiences those feelings with the character. First off, don’t resort to cliché actions like running a hand through his hair, or throwing a glass/vase/figurine at the fireplace. You’re a writer, be creative! Think of things more unique, and yet suited to the particular character. Also, make sure you go in order of how a body would react. Usually it’s physical reactions and thoughts first, then dialogue, then actions and body language. Scarlett O’Hara didn’t stamp her foot first and then feel her head sizzle with anger. She had a physical reaction first and used her foot stamping to punctuate her emotions. It’s not always this order of events, granted, but this is the typical order of things according to inertia—it takes more effort and more neurons firing to speak a

Dialogue is one of the best ways to reveal emotions, but it can also be overused. Just dialogue: If you only use dialogue to reveal emotions, the reader doesn’t quite get into the character’s head. They’re an audience at a play, not inside the character’s skin. Use dialogue in conjunction with thoughts, physical reactions, and actions in order to give your reader the full effect of the character’s emotions. Subtexting: Many times, the greatest emotion is conveyed by what the character doesn’t say. This is called subtexting or “cross-talk.” Sometimes it is also referred to as “off the nose” dialogue. Sometimes, you read dialogue and can take it at face value. Other times, there are subcurrents under the actual words said, meanings deeper and perhaps even the opposite of the dialogue. Those subcurrents make for juicy, conflicted, tension-filled dialogue. For a good example of subtexting (with commentary), read the Advanced Fiction Writing Ezine September 2006 edition . One of the best

Your characters are thinking all the time. You want to filter out all but their most important thoughts to convey to your reader. Those thoughts should be the ones that will specifically move your reader’s emotions. Thoughts are related to the writing craft topic of point of view. If you get deep into your character’s point of view, then his/her thoughts enhance the scene emotionally. The key here is that your character’s thoughts tell the reader how the character feels about the events happening, other people, or the surrounding area. Compare these two: Andrea O’Malley paused on the threshold of the Chinese restaurant. She wasn’t sure if she liked the exotic smells that teased her nose—spices she couldn’t name, as well as nutty sesame oil, salty-sweet oyster sauce, pungent soy sauce. She patted her French twist, which didn’t need fiddling with. She couldn’t help it—she was a golden-haired alien in the midst of these black-haired party guests. At least she hadn’t dressed inappropriate

Psychiatrists agree that we, as human beings, copy others fairly easily. We copy other people’s emotions or physical sensations, even though it’s all in our heads. It forms the basis for many psychological abnormalities. However, you as a writer can use this psychological phenomenon to your advantage. “When you understand the feelings of one of the characters in the moving picture, you are copying his tensions. You are feeling in yourself something of what he feels in the fictional situation. You are understanding the story with your own muscle tensions and with the spasm of your intestines and with your own glandular secretions. Without these reactions, the show would have no meaning.” –Psychiatrist David Fink, Techniques of the Selling Writer by Dwight Swain We can apply what happens to people in a movie to what you want your reader to feel as he/she reads. Describe your focal character’s emotions on a physical level. Make your reader really understand what the character’s body is g

Readers read because they care about the story. Let me repeat that—they care about the story. Caring involves emotions, which is why powerful stories evoke reader emotions. So how do you get your reader to care about the story? “You give them a stake in what happens.” –Dwight Swain When you start a scene, first of all pick a focal character for the reader to follow. This is also why one-point-of-view-per-scene has become more preferred by editors. When there’s one person for the reader to follow, it makes it easier to engage that reader’s emotions. The focal character doesn’t have to be the protagonist. It can be the antagonist, or it can be a secondary character. It can be someone the reader likes or someone the reader hates with a passion. Regardless, pick one person as the focal character for the scene. Then, give your focal character something to win or lose in that scene. Give them something at stake in that scene. The reader will have someone to root for or against for that sce

Certain words tend to evoke very specific and universal emotional reactions from people. For example, “jumped” is a rather neutral emotional word. However, “bounded” tends to denote more excited spirits in the person doing the bounding. “Stomping” tends toward anger. Other examples: “Protector” triggers a warmer emotional reaction when you read it than “Guardian.” “She swept the room with a piercing eye.” Versus “She swept the room with a piercing glare.” Versus “She swept the room with an observant eye.” Dwight Swain wrote: “Pay attention not just to words as words, but also to the feelings they mirror when people use them.” When getting into a character’s point of view, utilize specific words to draw out your reader’s emotions. That way, they’ll feel your character’s emotions with more intensity.

This is a fabulous article by Pat Holt which gives easy fixes for writers doing revisions. What’s even better is that she discusses these fixes so that a writer who hires an editor doesn’t pay the editor to do these fixes for him/her. Ten Mistakes Writers Don't See (But Can Easily Fix When They Do)

When your characters speak, worlds should move. Well, okay, not that dramatic. But pretty darn close. --Every word out of your character’s mouth has to mean something significant. Don’t let him or her say something that doesn’t have some kind of meaning, whether spoken or unspoken. --Use double-entendres, also called cross-talk or subtexting. Let them say more than (or the opposite of) what’s actually said. --“Dialogue is WAR.” – Randy Ingermanson, Advanced Fiction Writing E-zine. This is totally true! Your characters should be at odds with each other every time they talk. No, they don’t need to have shouting matches. However, they should each be fighting for or against each other in some other way. Fighting to keep a secret, fighting to get the other person to tell them something, fighting to know what to say, fighting to make themselves stop saying something. Conflict, conflict, conflict, baby! --Don’t let their conversations just serve to reveal their personalities. The conversatio

About ten, fifteen, twenty years ago, authors would write a story about a character responding to all the terrible things that happen to him/her. That was fine for twenty years ago. These days, the reactionary character is BORING. Your character shouldn’t simply react or respond to the horrible situations she finds herself in. Your character should be actively working toward a GOAL (uh-oh, Camy said the G-word). Your character should be PROACTIVE. For example, Parson’s daughter Eleanor is invited to her rich cousins’ house for the summer. She has grown up in poverty, and she only vaguely knows her aristocratic distant family. Various things happen that distress Eleanor. Her clothes are laughed at, the servants ignore her, her uncle tries to marry her to his horrible curate, her aunt falls deathly ill, and the boy she loves is in love with her selfish, spoiled cousin Agatha. This version of the story has Eleanor simply reacting to the bad things that happen to her. We don’t know what sh

One great way to make your characters sympathetic is to make them be lonely, abandoned, or rejected. Even a villain suffering from loneliness will evoke empathy (which can be a good thing, since villains should be both detestable and interesting to the reader). Lonely/neglected Most people don’t like being alone and will sympathize with a character who is. Why else do you think bad boy loner types are so popular? Readers love Harry Potter partly because he’s being shamefully neglected by his aunt and uncle. So make your character alone. Maybe they’ve pushed everyone away from them for some deep dark reason of their own. Maybe their personality makes them alone. Maybe they don’t know how to relate to people. Maybe they’re afraid. Abandoned Readers will often sympathize with someone who has been abandoned. This is a good way to make a villain sympathetic. This is a great place to dig deep into your writer’s emotions and project your own fears, doubts, anger, and hurt into a character w

In Tip #11, I mentioned to cut dialogue in a synopsis. However, sometimes there are conversations in a synopsis that are just like dialogue, only without the quotation marks. These conversations can be cut or condensed just like dialogue. For example: Duke tells Shelley he loves her. She denies it, saying she’s not worthy of love. He doesn’t understand and asks her why. She explains how her father was never there for her, how his job was more important to him than she was. Duke asserts she’s beloved by her Heavenly Father, and that his love for her mirror’s God’s love for her. versus Duke tells Shelley he loves her, easing her feelings of unworthiness by explaining the boundless love God has for her. Camy here: Look for these conversations in your manuscript and see if you can cut and condense. You don’t need to tell entire dialogues for a synopsis.

When writing a synopsis that has two protagonists—such as a hero and heroine, for example—make sure you separate different points of view with separate paragraphs. This helps the reader more easily and quickly differentiate between the two points of view. Easy and quick are the key words here, because an editor or agent skimming your synopsis is going to want to be able to most easily and quickly figure out what’s going on. And don’t kid yourself—they don’t have much time and they usually do skim that synopsis, so it has to be as clear as possible. For example: Shelley is run off the road by the men who want to kidnap her for ransom. She evades them on foot and runs to a darkened farmhouse at the top of a hill. Duke is sure there’s a burglar in his house, and heads to the basement with his rifle. versus Shelley is run off the road by the men who want to kidnap her for ransom. She evades them on foot and runs to a darkened farmhouse at the top of a hill. Duke is sure there’s a burglar