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Show versus Tell, examples

Many of you have seen the “Show, don’t tell” rule in writing articles and books. Basically, you want to “show” the reader the character’s emotions, not “tell” the reader the emotions the character is feeling. “Telling” tends to be distant point of view , which distances the reader from the character’s emotions. “Showing” involves your reader in what’s going on. It’s active and also concrete or tangible. The descriptions are usually more vivid and evoke emotion in the reader. Rather than telling information, show it through the character’s emotional reactions to something that happens in real time. Telling versus showing is a common mistake for writers because, at heart, we’re all storytellers, and that’s how storytellers “tell” a story. However, for writing fiction, you’d rather “show” the reader the action and make the reader an active participant in the events playing out. Put it this way: Like the audience of a play, the reader sees the characters acting and moving about on

Oh the Joys of Freewriting!

I talked about Freewriting and why that can help with character development over at the Seekerville blog: Camy here, talking today about how freewriting is saving my sanity. Yes, it’s true, I’m not being melodramatic (although Ruthy would probably differ—hush, woman!). Usually, when I’m brainstorming a new novel, I am armed with a pen, Post-It notes, and my closet doors: Click here to read the rest of the article

Motivation--got enough?

Cheryl Wyatt posted on character internal motivations over at Seekerville today: ToooT! TooooT! Chugga-chugga-chugga-chugga.... Welcome to Seekerville! Today I wanted to talk about something that I think is crucial in story structure, yet something not a lot of authors fully understand. I'm still on this learning train too by the way. Just this week I was brainstorming a new proposal with my editors in New York the day before Book Expo America and it dawned on me that character motivation has many more layers than I had really consciously thought about before. Click here to read the rest of the post, which includes examples!

Tips for How to Present Backstory

Even if you don't present backstory in the first chapter of a novel, you have to present at some time in the book. But there are a few tricks you can use to make that backstory as emotionally compelling as possible. I wrote this article, which originally appeared on Suite101. Tips for How to Present Backstory Make a Character’s Past History Compelling Here are some good tricks to use when writing backstory in a novel so that the reader is intrigued by the information. The key to presenting backstory in a way that is interesting to a reader boils down to one piece of advice: Make the reader want to know the information. As a reader gets to know the characters and become interested in them, she will naturally want to know more about them. But even beyond this natural interest, up the stakes. Make the past important to the reader because it ties together mysterious threads of the current action. Dole Out Backstory in Bits and Pieces When information is given out slowly,

Save the Backstory For Later

Ever wonder why you hear that it's "taboo" to include backstory in the first chapter of a novel? I always did, too, until I discovered some psychological reasons why it's best to keep it out of the first chapter for the modern reader. I wrote an article, which originally appeared on Suite101. Save the Backstory For Later Why Not to Present Backstory in the First Chapter There are three reasons why it’s usually best for a writer not to include backstory in a novel’s first chapter. Writers often hear the advice to not include backstory or the character’s past history within the first chapter of the story. Many balk at this. After all, a character’s backstory explains things, makes the character’s actions make more sense. Otherwise, the reader will be confused or, worse, dislike the protagonist for his actions because there’s no explanation for this aberrant behavior. Also, backstory sets the stage for future conflict. Past secrets often cause problems for t

Opening a Scene In a Character’s Viewpoint

As a follow up to my article about establishing the viewpoint character at the beginning of a scene, I also wrote this article, which originally appeared on Suite101, on a few tips for how to continue with the scene from the viewpoint character. Opening a Scene In a Character’s Viewpoint Some Do’s and Don’ts For Establishing Point of View There are a few things to keep in mind when establishing the point of view character at the beginning of a scene. When a writer opens a scene, the viewpoint character should be immediately established in order to slip the reader into a character’s skin. But once you’ve established the viewpoint character, there are a few things to remember in order to keep the reader interested. Plant and Point Deliberately Don’t waste the reader’s time by pointing out things that are insignificant to the story or that don’t somehow establish characterization. For example, if the hero likes the color blue, but it’s not relevant to the story, don’t hav

Establish the Character Viewpoint

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I wrote this article, which originally appeared on Suite101, on a few quick tips for opening a scene and establishing the point of view character. Establish the Character Viewpoint Start the Scene Quickly in Someone’s Point of View Utilize these tips in establishing the point of view character when opening a scene. In his book, Techniques of the Selling Writer , Dwight Swain writes this about character viewpoint: Viewpoint is the spot from which you see a story. It’s the position and perspective you occupy in order best to savor a fictional experience. Ordinarily, that vantage point is inside somebody’s skin. That is, your reader will live through your story as some specific character experiences it. He’ll see and hear and smell and taste and touch and think and feel precisely what that person sees and hears and smells and what have you. Keep this in mind as you establish character viewpoint—slip your reader into the character’s skin. Choose the Viewpoint Character

Developing Your Writer's Voice

Camy here: This is a compilation of my short series of posts on Developing Your Writer's Voice that I posted back in 2006, but I have put them all in one article for you here. One vital way to make your writing stand out is voice. In many of the contest entries I've judged and manuscripts I've critiqued, writers have muted their natural voice to sound bland and generic. Writing that's alive with its own distinct vocal flavor is a joy to read. The prose is richer and more vibrant, the characters more three-dimensional--all because the writer opens herself to her own writing style and revels in it. However, voice can also be the most difficult and slippery aspect of writing craft to discover and perfect. Raw, creative voice often doesn't result in a polished piece. The key is to first lay down the story with your unhindered voice and polish later. But how to unleash your voice? Many times, a writer's internal critic is hampering the free reign of his unique style

The Basics of Introducing a Character

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I wrote this article, which originally appeared on Suite101, on introducing a character in your novel. The Basics of Introducing a Character A Few Main Points For When a Character Steps on the Page Three things to remember when introducing a character, whether the main character or a minor one. Whenever a character makes a “first appearance” in the novel, there are three things a novelist should remember when writing the scene. Create a Strong, Quick First Impression Ideally, the novelist wants the character onstage quickly, without a long paragraph of description. Give a strong first impression without a lot of detail—simply a phrase to anchor the character in the reader’s mind. Here is where a cliché could actually be used, because it’s a quick way to create a colorful impression with few words: “a spunky redhead” or “a one-legged pirate” or “a powerful businessman.” Whatever the writer chooses to create that first impression, make it the most significant aspect of

Fiction After 50 seminars

Here's a note from author Ron Benrey: Janet and I are launching “Fiction After 50” seminars to help late-blooming novelists write publishable fiction and market their manuscripts to real publishers. The first Fiction After 50 seminar is scheduled in Dallas, on July 17-19; the next is in Orlando, on October 2-4. Each seminar is an intensive program -- 2.5 full days of classes, workshops, and guided small-group brainstorming sessions filled with practical exercises -- that will help unpublished novelists refine their novels-in-progress (or their ideas for the novels they want to write) and increase the likelihood that they'll sell to royalty-paying publishers. We’ll also teach many “hurry-up” strategies that can accelerate the process of finishing and marketing a manuscript. For more information visit: www.fictionafter50.com Incidentally, our Fiction After 50 seminars will be "managed" by Free Expressions Seminars and Literary Services, the same group the does the excel

Strong Emotional Reactions, part two

Check out the second part of my two-parter at Seekerville, talking about Strong Emotional Reactions. On Friday, I went into the other TWO of the four different types of emotional reactions and how you can mix and match them to create stronger emotions in your story. Also, check out the comments there--people bring up some good questions and I answer them in the comments. Strong Emotional Reactions, part two

Stong Emotional Reactions, part one

I am over at Seekerville in a two-parter, talking about Strong Emotional Reactions. Yesterday, I went into TWO of the four different types of emotional reactions and how you can mix and match them to create stronger emotions in your story. Also, check out the comments there--people bring up some good questions and I answer them in the comments. Strong Emotional Reactions, part one

Create a Relatable Character

In my first drafts, I often have a problem in making my characters likeable within the first page or two. Since your reader will probably only give you a page or two in the bookstore, you need to capture their interest fast. I wrote this article, which originally appeared on Suite101, with a few tips on how to do that. Create a Relatable Character Use Tips and Tricks to Create Character Empathy in the First Five Pages In the first five pages of a novel, use actions or traits that psychologically cause readers to relate to or like a character very quickly. Most readers—including editors and agents—look at the first few pages to determine if the characters are worth reading about. Writers can utilize certain actions and traits that cause the reader to like the character or relate to him on a psychological level, without knowing anything else about him, and sometimes even showing him doing unsavory things a few pages later. Utilize for Both Sympathetic and Empathetic Charact

The first page, part 7 - Indicate point of view

This is continuing my series on things to look for in your first page. Click here for part six. Indicate point of view Make it obvious to the reader whose head he/she is in. Don’t leave them guessing—readers want to be grounded in the story as soon as possible. Here is where you can utilize deep point of view and WOW that editor. Drop them into a character’s head—a character who is so fascinating and unique that they’re struck by the vibrancy of the character’s personality or completely relate to the character’s struggles. Use deep point of view to accomplish this. Let the reader experience the character’s emotions, reactions, thoughts. Let the reader cringe or laugh when the character does. Let the reader feel everything that character feels. Let the reader know exactly what the character thinks about the things happening to him/her. Let your reader become that character from the first sentence, until your reader is transformed by the end of page one. Again, forgive me for using my

Q&A: hero

Dear Ms. Tang, I've read a lot of your articles on writing, trying to shape my idea into a better novel. I've found that one tip I'm finding a hard time following is this... As soon as you can in the story, commit the character to their goal for the book. There shouldn't be any easy way out or turning back. Once the character decides on a course of action, he can't stall, run, or quit--there should be something logical, believable and powerful preventing him. The character should irrevocably decide to fight whatever danger threatens him. I don't have an apathetic/unmotivated main character, but I do consider his most identifying personality trait to be the opposite of such heroes as Frodo Baggins, Luke Skywalker, etc. as he does not yearn for adventure. He is full of self-doubt and lacks confidence, despite being the one destined to save everyone else and having the most potential/power to do so. My idea was to make his biggest enemy himself, needing to overcom

The first page, part 6 - Use key words deliberately

This is continuing my series on things to look for in your first page. Click here for part five. Use key words deliberately In the first page, especially, you want to be extremely deliberate with every single word you use. If you have bland or neutral words, try substituting stronger key words that will indicate genre or develop your story’s atmosphere. You can always change it back if it doesn’t sound right or do what you want it to. (Forgive me for using my own writing as an example, but it was easier than typing up a few paragraphs from a book. The following is from Single Sashimi :) Venus Chau opened the door to her aunt’s house and smelled something terrible. “What’s that smell?” She tried to hold her breath. Her cousin Jennifer Lim entered the foyer with an angry look. “She’s making my kitchen smell.” “Who?” Venus hesitated on the threshold, breathing clean air. “My mother, who else?” versus Venus Chau opened the door to her aunt’s house and almost fainted. “What died?” She exhal

Story Sensei now offering phone consultations/mentoring

Hi guys! I now offer telephone consultations or mentoring. Cost is $75 per hour, and I will be able to mail you a CD with an MP3 recording of our call. I offer consultations/mentoring on a variety of topics, from writing craft to marketing and writing business. I can do brainstorming, advice/mentoring on agent and editor research, tips on marketing, pretty much any kind of question you might have. Clients are welcome to "try me out" with a 20-minute call at a cost of $25. Finding the "right" mentor for you is like finding the "right" spouse--it takes time, trial and error. Clients must prepay for their mentoring calls, and all calls are charged in increments of 20 minutes. For example, if your call only lasts 15 minutes, you will be charged $25. See my info page for payment options.

I'm on deadline

Hey everybody, Just a heads up, I'm going to be a bit scarce the next few weeks. I'm on deadline for a new book. I'll post a little bit but not regularly. I'll be back up and running in May Update: I'll start posting again around May 10th! Camy

Tips to Trim a Synopsis

These tips originally appeared as individual blog posts. I'm posting them all here for convenience. If I write more tips on trimming a synopsis, I'll include them here, too. Why do I need to trim a synopsis? While I haven’t talked to every editor and agent on the planet, the majority of the ones I’ve spoken to prefer a 2-3 page synopsis. However, every editor is different. One editor will want a one-page synopsis, another will want an extensive chapter-by-chapter synopsis . In my experience, it’s usually better to opt for the shorter synopsis when submitting a proposal. If they want a longer one, they usually specifically mention that they do. Another reason to have a short synopsis handy: Writing contests often have you submit a short, 1-2 page synopsis with your entry. Here’s a little tip: when querying a novel, it doesn’t hurt to slip a one-page synopsis in with your one-page query letter. And it doesn’t cost any more in postage. Also, when submitting a partial manuscript or

Steeple Hill editor podcast link

Got this from Cheryl Wyatt: Someone just sent me this link. Thought it'd be helpful to anyone targeting Steeple Hill. http://www.eharlequin.com/store.html?cid=749 Hugs -- Cheryl Wyatt www.cherylwyatt.com 15-author blog! www.seekerville.blogspot.com Ready-Made Family (4.5 stars RT) IN STORES NOW!

Tweak a Cliché Into Something Original

I wrote this article, which originally appeared on Suite101, on how to take a cliche and make it something wonderful. Tweak a Cliché Into Something Original Take a Tired Phrase and Make It Zing Utilize a writer’s voice, a writer’s brand, phrase additions, and key words to change clichéd phrases into fresh prose. The old saying, “There’s nothing new under the sun” is very true and a death knoll for writers. How can writers come up with fresh prose when it’s all been done before? How can writers avoid using clichés when sometimes there’s no other way to say something? Utilize Your Unique Writer’s Voice There is often a way you say things that is uniquely you—utilize it in your prose. Here’s an example from my book, Single Sashimi : Venus Chau opened the door to her aunt’s house and almost fainted. “What died?” She exhaled sharply, trying to get the foul air out of her body before it caused cancer or something. The last sentence, especially, people have remarked sounds v

Utilize reader statistics

An old article of mine is on WannaBePublished.blogspot.com today! The Gallup Poll website is fascinating. Okay, I admit, I’m a geek. However, it’s also useful in gathering information about the book business, which is important for a writer. Click here to read the rest of the article.

96 HOUR SPECIAL

To Readers of My Advanced Fiction Writing E-zine: This is Randy Ingermanson, with a special note for you. Tax Day has come and gone, and I hope you've survived. This past year has been brutal for all of us. May the next year be better! To celebrate getting past Tax Day, I'm running one of my famous super-slasher sales on my web site store. Everything is 50% off for the next 96 hours. If you're getting a tax refund this year, you might want to consider taking advantage of my 50%-off sale to invest in your writing career. For less than the cost of a month of cell phone service, you could take action that would improve your writing skills for a lifetime. This 96-hour special runs from midnight on Thursday, April 16, 2009, through midnight on Monday, April 20. (All times are California time.) Sorry, but I can't give extensions on this. When it's over, it's over. I don't run these ultra-discount sales very often. The last was in December. In order to take advanta

I'm teaching at the ACFW conference!

Hey guys, My workshop "The Hero and Heroine's Journeys" just got accepted for the American Christian Fiction Writers conference this year! I'll be teaching on--duh--the Hero and Heroine's Journeys. If you've never used the Heroine's Journey, especially, and you have a female main protagonist, this will be a good workshop for you for characterization. The ACFW Conference is in Denver, Colorado this year, from September 17th through the 20th. Information is on the ACFW website . Registration hasn't opened yet, and only ACFW members can attend the conference (but it's only $50 membership fee for the first year to join ACFW, and believe me, it's totally worth it to join! I talk about ACFW here . If you have questions about ACFW, just leave a question in the comments.) They'll announce when registration is open for the conference on the ACFW members email loop. So anyway, I hope you (a) join ACFW and (b) take my workshop in Denver this year!

Book in a Nutshell contest

The Knight Agency is holding a Book in a Nutshell Contest Submit three compelling sentences (150 words max) about your completed, unpublished manuscript to submissions@... Write BOOK IN A NUTSHELL in the subject line or it will not be deemed eligible. One submission per project, please. Twenty of the best submissions will be chosen and requested by various agents who will then give feedback on your work...and it may even lead to possible representation. Hurry, the deadline is April 20, 2009. Winners will be notified by May 1, 2009. For more info, go to http://tinyurl.com/cnfe9d

Avoid Info Dumps in Dialogue

I admit, I'm prone to info dumps in my dialogue, especially in my first drafts, and I have to edit them out in my revisions. I wrote this article, which originally appeared on Suite101, with some of my tips and tricks. Avoid Info Dumps in Dialogue Strengthen Your Dialogue By Eliminating Telling Eliminating the Info Dump in dialogue will create mystery that keeps your reader riveted while strengthening the prose. In publishing days long past, it wasn’t uncommon to find a character who starts a line of dialogue with the infamous, “As you know ...” For example: Gerald walked into the living room and announced, “Phillip, our mother is at the door. As you know, she ran off twenty years ago with the family lawyer and we haven’t heard from her since.” Today’s readers and publishing industry has moved toward eliminating this technique, which is “telling” and not “showing” the story to the reader. Emulate Real Life In real life, people don’t need to remind their listeners

Shorten Your Dialogue

Sometimes, in my haste to make sure the reader knows something, I'll have a character go on and on in a line of dialogue, and I'll have to edit it out in revisions. I wrote this article, which originally appeared in Suite101. Shorten Your Dialogue Improve Pacing and Add Emotion With More Deliberate Dialogue Often, shorter dialogue lines with more deliberate word choices can improve a scene’s pace and create greater emotional impact. In real life, people don’t often have long speeches. Most of the time, someone will interrupt them—maybe when they pause for breath—or the speaker will purposefully pause for a reaction from the person they’re talking to. It should be the same in your fiction. Contemporary Fiction The dialogue in a present-day novel should be more back-and-forth, give-and-take, which is what real-life dialogue is like. One person says a sentence or two, the other person responds to what they said. A character who goes on and on for a paragraph or two i

The first page, part 5 - Establish the tone or atmosphere

This is continuing my series on things to look for in your first page. Click here for part four. Establish the tone or atmosphere of the story In addition to using key words to indicate genre, use key words to develop a certain feel to the writing, setting, and story in that first page. Remember, you are dumping the reader in a completely new story world. You want them to be able to know what type of story this is going to be right off the bat. If they’re expecting a gripping, emotional story and the first page is heavy with action, they’re going to close the book. If your story is going to be humorous, start it out humorously. Also, use key words that indicate whether it’s dry British humor or slapstick comedy or sarcastic chick lit. If it’s going to be a roller-coaster ride, start it out quickly. Use strong words and sharp sentences to strap the reader in for a wild read. If it’s going to be deeply emotional, start it out emotionally. Use words that evoke strong emotional responses s

Reciprocal blog links?

Hey guys, Sorry I've been AWOL the past week, I've been too busy! Anyway, before I continue on with my series on The First Page, I wanted to know if any of you wanted to trade blog links? I'm going to set up a Blogroll on this blog and if you already link to this Story Sensei blog, please email me or comment below to let me know! Camy

Medicals for Harlequin Mills & Boon

Have you ever considered writing Medicals for Harlequin Mills & Boon? Want the inside scoop? Wednesday, March 11 Laura Iding will be in Seekerville sharing about the Medicals line. Laura has written 18 books for Harlequin Mills & Boon over the past five years. Her most recent book is Emergency: Single Dad, Mother Needed. And she's giving away a copy of her latest release. See you there. www.seekerville.blogspot.com

Two Dogs. One Bone

Pam Hillman wrote a really great article detailing character conflict in a novel. She simplifies the concept of conflict but also makes it easy to grasp, a jumping off point for writers: I’ve started a new wip (work-in-progress) and while I’m excited and have a lot of angst and conflict planned for my characters, the core conflict between my hero and heroine doesn’t feel strong enough to carry the entire book. Or at least it’s not fleshed out enough for me to see it. So I started looking around for ways to define that backbone and nail it down. (Ouch, that sounds painful, doesn’t it?) Click here to read the rest of "Two Dogs. One Bone."

The first page, part 4 - Indicate the genre

This is continuing my series on things to look for in your first page. Click here for part three. Indicate the genre When an editor opens your book, he/she should be able to tell what your genre is right off the bat. Genre does not have to be established in the first line, but it should be fairly obvious by the end of the first page. You don’t want to open your story with: The wagon train left a dust cloud that Shep could see from seven miles away. when your story is a contemporary thriller. Use key words to indicate to the editor/reader what genre your novel is. Certain words or phrases are indicative of different genres by tapping associations in a reader’s mind. “Glock” will usually indicate a suspense or thriller or crime drama. “Wagon train” will usually indicate a Western or a historical prairie romance. “Desire” in context will typically clue the reader in to the fact that the story is a romance of some sort. Another benefit of indicating genre in the first page is that it will

Common Contest Problems

My friend Danica blogged about some Common Contest Problems , and her post might be a helpful checklist for anyone trying to strengthen those first 50 pages of their manuscript: I'm doing my civic duty and judging some contest entries today. I had really high hopes for this one. In years past, I've read such good entries that I wanted to write the contest people, begging to read the rest of the manuscript. This year, not so much. As I read each entry, I realized that they all had the same problems in common. So I thought, for the writers who read my blog, I'd share the commonalities. Click here to read the rest of the post.