What the Story Sensei is about

Quick list of services:
Synopsis critique - book doctoring New! Synopsis worksheet available for $5
Manuscript critique
Screening critique New!
Phone consultations/mentoring New!
Synopsis Condensation
Synopsis critique and Condensation
Proposal and Synopsis critique
Novel Proposal critique, synopsis critique, and synopsis condensation
Synopsis writing
Query letter critique

Endorsements
Privacy and Disclaimers
Submission guidelines
Payment
Other resources
About me

Has your manuscript been rejected by an editor or agent, and you're not sure why?

Editor and agent rejection letters can be notoriously vague--it's not on purpose, they just don't have the time for a detailed analysis.

Often a novel is rejected because of a weak story structure, like a heroine's internal goal is never fully developed, or the conflicts don't act directly against the hero's external goal, and so the story seems disjointed. Those kinds of things can be seen in your synopsis.

Do you feel something's "off" with your story, but you don't know what?

Sometimes the problem isn't with the writing itself--it's in the story or the scene structure. Certain story elements naturally combine to create a riveting reading flow, but if your scene or plot is weak in one of those elements, the manuscript will seem off-kilter.

If you think this might be a problem with your manuscript, you don't want to pay thousands of dollars for a freelance line editor when you could fix those story elements yourself.

I offer an inexpensive, specialized alternative.

Synopsis critique -- book doctoring
$60

I will do a high-level developmental critique of your synopsis (up to 10 single-spaced pages).

I pinpoint any structural issues that can be fixed and offer suggestions to create a more cohesive, compelling storyline:

• Good pacing, strong sense of movement
• Setting as a character
• Unique story premise
• Voice
• Clear story arc--beginning, middle, end
• Inciting Incident
• External goals
• Internal goals
• Obstacles/conflict
• Epiphany/sacrifice
• Black Moment
• Flaws
• Unique/original characters
• Secondary characters--goals, depth, contribute to the story

For an example of what a synopsis critique looks like, click here to view a .pdf file.

Price does NOT include a second read-through after revisions. Resubmissions will count as a new submission with another fee.

New! Synopsis writing worksheet available for $5!

Manuscript critique

I also offer more detailed critiques on scene structure and writing style. I will critique PARTIAL or FULL fiction manuscripts.

I will identify any weaknesses in story structure, character arcs, writing style, and other aspects of a high-level structural critique. I will also analyze your manuscript for key writing and story elements:

• Opening hook/scene
• Pacing
• POV (point of view)
• Smooth dialogue, necessary, no redundancies
• Distinct character voices
• Adverbs
• Passive verbs
• Backstory
• Description, vivid picture, 5 senses
• Show vs. tell
• Rhythm/balance between narrative and dialogue
• Tags vs. beats
• Unique prose or cliché
• Character emotions
• Voice
• Scene structure--goal, conflict, disaster/reaction, dilemma, decision
• Scene necessity/redundancies

I charge a flat rate based on your manuscript’s total word count (using computer word count).

1 to 3,000 words: $40
3,001 to 6,000 words: $75
6,001 to 10,000 words: $120
10,001 to 15,000 words: $175
15,001 to 20,000 words: $230
20,001 to 25,000 words: $275
25,001 to 30,000 words: $325
30,001 to 35,000 words: $370
35,001 to 40,000 words: $415
40,001 to 45,000 words: $450
45,001 words and above: 1 (one) cent per word, exact computer word count (not in increments)

Numbers above are your manuscript’s total word count, whether partial or full manuscripts.

For instance, if you’d like me to critique a partial manuscript of three chapters, 33,333 words, it would cost $370.

If your partial manuscript is only 8,888 words, then it would cost $120.

If you wanted your full manuscript critiqued and it’s a total of 80,765 words, it would cost $807.65.

If you have any questions, feel free to e-mail me and I can give you a price quote.

Price does NOT include a second read-through after revisions. Resubmissions will count as a new submission with another fee.

New service!
Screening Critique

I now offer an inexpensive partial manuscript critique that you can choose first to find out if you’d like to hire me for your full manuscript.

My Screening Critique is one of four options:

(a) the first 3,000 words of your manuscript for $40.

(b) the first 6,000 words of your manuscript for $75.

(c) the first 3,000 words of your manuscript PLUS a two-page, single-spaced synopsis for $60 ($40 for manuscript, $20 for 2-page synopsis).

(d) the first 6,000 words of your manuscript PLUS a two-page, single-spaced synopsis for $95 ($75 for manuscript, $20 for 2-page synopsis).

After the critique, if you decide you would like to hire me for your full manuscript, you can send me the rest of your manuscript and I will give you a discount off the cost of the full manuscript critique—$40 or $75, or whatever the cost of your Screening Critique.

The Screening Critique is a good way to determine if you like my editing style. It is also inexpensive, since you can choose option (a), which is only $40.

Also, I have often found that some writing issues can be seen in the first 3,000-6,000 words, and so a Screening Critique would give you feedback that you can use to revise the rest of your manuscript.

After the Screening Critique, you don’t have to hire me for your full manuscript right away. If you want to take some time to apply the feedback from the Screening Critique and revise your full manuscript, go ahead. When you contact me to do your full manuscript, simply remind me that I did a Screening Critique for you so that I remember to give you a discount.

Other services:

Phone consultation/mentoring

I now offer telephone consultations or mentoring on a variety of topics, from writing craft to marketing/blogging and writing business. I can do brainstorming, advice/mentoring on agent and editor research, tips on marketing, pretty much any kind of question you might have.

Cost is $75 per hour, and I will mail you a CD with an MP3 recording of our call. In addition, I will send you a Word .doc file with links and notes to compliment our telephone call, and if you have any questions, you're free to email me to ask.

Clients are welcome to "try me out" with a 20-minute call at a cost of $25. Finding the "right" mentor for you is like finding the "right" spouse--it takes time, trial and error.

Clients must prepay for their mentoring calls, and all calls are charged in increments of 20 minutes. For example, if your call only lasts 15 minutes, you will be charged $25.

Synopsis condensation
$135

Often, a writer will need to submit a short synopsis for a contest or in a proposal. In general, editors and agents prefer synopses 1-3 pages in length.

I will cut your synopsis down to any number of pages or words it needs to be shortened—all the way down to one page double-spaced, if that’s what you need. Your original synopsis can be up to 40 single-spaced pages.

Price does NOT include a second read-through after revisions. Resubmissions will count as a new submission with another fee.

Synopsis critique and condensation
$185

I will both critique your synopsis (see above) and cut it down to any number of pages or words it needs to be shortened. Your original synopsis can be up to 40 single-spaced pages.

Price does NOT include a second read-through after critique and revision. Resubmissions will count as a new submission with another fee.

Novel Proposal and synopsis critique
$100

I will critique your synopsis (see above) and your novel proposal, which includes hook, bio, marketing analysis, etc.

Proposal does NOT include sample manuscript chapters. For manuscript chapter critique, see above.

Price does NOT include a second read-through after revisions. Resubmissions will count as a new submission with another fee.

Novel Proposal critique, synopsis critique, and synopsis condensation
$220

I will critique your novel proposal, which includes hook, bio, marketing analysis, etc.

Also, I will both critique your synopsis and cut it down to any number of pages or words it needs to be shortened.

Total number of pages for synopsis and proposal can be up to 40 single-spaced pages. Price includes a second read-through after critique and revision.

Proposal does NOT include sample manuscript chapters. For manuscript chapter critique, see table above.

Synopsis writing
1/2 cent per word (computer word count of full manuscript)

From your full, completed manuscript, I will write two synopses for you:

One synopsis of any length you specify, single or double-spaced and
One chapter-by-chapter synopsis

This does not include any type of critique of your manuscript or the completed synopsis. See prices below for manuscript critique.

Once I have delivered your synopses, the price does not include additional condensation—see prices above for synopsis condensation.

Query letter critique
$10

Query letter critique is free when combined with any other service. You must mention your query letter when contacting me about your project.

Endorsements

Click here for reviews about my critiques from published authors and contest finalists.

Privacy and disclaimers

I will keep your story ideas confidential, and you own the copyright to your material, no matter which changes I suggest.

I do not do comprehensive grammatical copy editing. For those services, see below.

Use of any of these services does NOT guarantee publication, contest finals, contest wins, or submission invitations.

Submission guidelines

Service is first come, first served. Please e-mail me at storysensei @ gmail.com before sending anything. Please put "Story Sensei" in the subject line.

I will do either electronic or hard copy submissions, although I prefer electronic submissions.

For electronic submissions, I use the "Track Changes" feature in Microsoft Word. If you do not use Microsoft Word, let me know and I will save the file as a .pdf file so that you can see my changes and comments using Adobe Acrobat.

If you do not wish me to use "Track Changes," I can insert my comments in ALL CAPS or colored font, but I charge an additional 20% to all services for this method of critique.

For hard copy submissions, you must print and ship your project to me. You must also pay for postage to ship your project back to you. I also charge an additional 20% to all services for this method of critique.

Payment

Payment is required upfront. I will not send your critique back to you if you have not rendered payment.

Included in all my services is my time for any questions you might have after the critique is returned to you.

I can take PayPal (use this e-mail for payment: camy @ camytang.com). If you’re not sure how to make a PayPal payment, e-mail me and I can send you an “invoice” e-mail that makes things a bit easier.

I can also take checks or money orders, and they should be made out to "Camy Tang."
My mailing address is:
Camy Tang
P.O. Box 23143
San Jose, CA 95153-3143
If you pay with a personal check, I will wait until the check clears before sending your critique to you.

Other resources

Articles

I've written several articles on the craft of writing that can help beginning and intermediate writers. They are all posted on this blog--the list of articles is on the sidebar.

I also post short writing tips on this Story Sensei blog every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday.

For beginning writers, I'd like to suggest you start with Articles from Swain, a series of articles based on the classic writing book Techniques of the Selling Writer by Dwight V. Swain.

I also have two articles:
"I want to write a novel and I have no clue what to do!"
"I've written a novel and I have no clue what to do next!"

Writing coaching, mentoring, and other critique services I recommend:

Meredith Efken has an excellent one-on-one coaching service for new writers:
Fiction Fix-It Shop Coaching services

Ronie Kendig and Sara Mills are excellent freelance editors who are also extremely affordable:
DoubleCrit.com

Award-winning author Mary DeMuth has a comprehensive writing service business called The Writing Spa:
The Writing Spa

Copy editing

I do not do grammatical copy editing. If you wish help in that area, may I suggest:

The Christian PEN

About me:

I am a fiction author published with Zondervan, writing Asian Christian chick lit/romance. My debut novel, Sushi for One, released in September 2007, with more novels releasing in 2008.

Although I grew up in Hawaii, I moved to Northern California in 1990. I used to be a biologist researcher, but when I got laid off, I started writing again. Several years (and another biology job) later, I was contracted with Sushi for One. Now, I write full-time while trying to keep the house clean for my engineer husband and butt-headed doggy.

I have been running the Story Sensei for a few years, with many happy clients (see my Endorsements page for what people are saying about my critique services).

I specialize in high-level substantive critiques, which sets my services apart from other freelance editors who are more focused on developmental or line edits. This is also why my synopsis critique option is in such high demand--I look at overall story structure and character arcs.

I can do any genre except erotica (no offense, I just don't care to read it). I am well-versed in contemporary romance, romantic suspense, women's fiction, chick lit, historical romance, and young adult.

If you have any questions, feel free to email me!