Skip to main content

The first page, part 9 - Make every word count

This is continuing my series on things to look for in your first page.
Click here for part eight.

Make every word count

This goes back to how you only have one page to hook an editor. If that editor isn’t hooked by that first page, he or she will move the entire manuscript to the Reject pile without even bothering to go to page two.

That being the case, you should expend considerable effort to not have any useless words on that first page.

Make every description juicy and unique, without any “throw-away” words or phrases.

Make every line of dialogue snappy and emotional, without unnecessary tags or adverbs.

Make every sentence concise and precise—nothing meandering or vague or fluffy.

Introduce your character with clear but unique descriptors, whether in dialogue or by action. Don’t waste time with backstory and “telling” the reader what’s happening—suck the reader in to “show” them what’s happening as it happens to the character.

Dwight Swain has an entire chapter in his book Techniques of the Selling Writer, where he talks about just the words a writer should use. Now, granted, Swain is a bit wordy himself, but he wouldn’t go off for so long on the topic if it weren’t important.

So go through every word on that first page and determine its importance and it’s vibrancy.

If a word is bland, try to come up with something stronger. If a word is unnecessary, cut ruthlessly.

Spend time on each and every word, no matter how tedious that might sound to you. Just do it, because you’ll be glad you did when an editor reads that first page and then HAS to read on to page two.

Click here for part ten.

Labels

Labels:

Comments

  1. Katie GanshertWed Jul 08, 05:34:00 AM 2009

    AFter reading this post, I'm off to go check my first pages!! Excellent advice. :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. JenniferWed Jul 08, 06:08:00 AM 2009

    Great advice! I used to have a problem with this. I think some of the best advice I've ever heard is that if you can't start a book without giving ten pages of backstory, start the book earlier.

    I revised my first five pages about thirty times. It's about three pages shorter than it was when I first wrote it, and a lot better for it. I totally agree with what you say.

    Thanks for sharing! :D

    ReplyDelete
  3. Sarah ForgraveWed Jul 08, 07:21:00 AM 2009

    Thanks for another great post, Camy! I'm working through 'The First Five Pages' by Noah Lukeman, and his exercises hone these points as well. It's definitely a challenge to make each word sing, but a necessary and worthwhile one.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Camy TangWed Jul 08, 09:26:00 AM 2009

    Thanks, guys! I always have problems with my first pages, too. I tend to revise and cut the most in that first chapter. Sarah, The First Five Pages is a great book--I love that one!
    Camy

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Writing Fight Scenes

I love martial arts movies and action flicks. So naturally I'd write action scenes. I discovered that it takes a slightly different writing style. These are some of the things I learned, although this list isn't exhaustive by any means. Action-Reaction A fight scene is always Action-Reaction. He punches, she staggers back. She kicks, he blocks and swings a fist at her. Watch out for putting your reaction before your action: She staggered back when he slammed his fist into her shoulder. The rule of thumb is to have each action-reaction have its own paragraph, although that’s not always possible. Sometimes the sentences are too short for their own paragraphs and can be combined. It’s up to the writer how to format it: He swung a roundhouse punch. She bent backward and felt his knuckles swish past her nose. versus: He swung a roundhouse punch. She bent backward and felt his knuckles swish past her nose. Short sentences = fast reading flow Use short sentences and phrases to make re...
5 comments
Read more

The 50-word elevator pitch

The 50-word elevator pitch: Basic story elements and a two-sentence novel summary Writing a 50-word summary is good to help you condense your thoughts and themes for your novel. This summary can be used when you pitch to editors or agents, and it can also be used in a query letter to an editor or agent. Swain gives this excellent method to come up with a 2-sentence (or 50-word) summary of your novel. This can be done before you write it or afterward, whichever works best for your writing style. This is similar to steps 1 and 2 of Randy Ingermanson's Snowflake method : https://www.advancedfictionwriting.com/articles/snowflake-method/ Each novel typically has five basic story elements: Character --Your protagonist or focal character. You can sometimes have two protagonists, but even then, often the story of one character is slightly more dominant than the other. Situation --The troubling situation your character is stuck in that forces him to act. Objective --What y...
7 comments
Read more

How to write a kiss

There was a question on the writer’s Discord server that I’m on where someone asked how to write a kiss. They weren’t specifically asking me, but I was able to give a short answer for how I write kisses. I write and read traditional romances, so my kiss scenes tend to be heavily influenced by the genre and by how my editors critiqued my manuscripts. You basically want to focus on the emotion of the kiss and how the kiss makes the point of view character feel, as opposed to going deep into physical detail. Ideally, the description will show that the kiss is something special and not just them macking. For example the kiss made her feel ___. Or the kiss was ___ which made it seem that he felt ___ for her. “The kiss made her feel as if she were incredibly precious to him.” “His lips were gentle and almost tentative, as if he were afraid of frightening her.” “The kiss surprised her and yet felt as familiar as if they’d kissed a thousand times before. The kiss felt like home.” I...
2 comments
Read more